Traveling Solo | Living the Dream | Kuang Si Falls

As a write this (I’m behind on my entries…), I have less than one month left of my trip. Today, I spent the afternoon on a beach in Vietnam playing volleyball with a group of travelers. For me, this hasn’t just been a trip, but the start and continuation of a life/style that I have dreamed of and hoped for in my adult life. In sharing this blog with my friends, family, and the larger world, I hope I can offer inspiration and encouragement to people rather than evoke jealousy and envy. Many avid travelers, including myself, experience friends and acquaintances saying things like, “you’re so lucky,” and “I’ve always wanted to do that.” Traveling is rarely intangible, but it does take ambition, and you must want it. Many romanticized aspects of traveling get shattered, and you should be emotionally prepared for that. As someone told me before I left, “many have the opportunity, but few take it.”

Fellow female travel blogger, Adventures Kate, sums up my feelings well in her entry “Dear Ladies: This Can Be Your Life, Too.” Kate echos what I’ve said many times.

My life is filled with blessings, privileges, and “luck” in it’s own right, (I’m sooo lucky that the nice people that found my wallet at that gay bar in Cambodia contacted me and returned it!) but, I’ve manifested my reality through creativity, hard work, creating goals, and making traveling my number one priority. My priority isn’t to make the most money and acquire the most things. No matter what kind of lives we are living, “security” never really happens…it’s an illusion. It is one in which we find a great deal of comfort, but in the words of the Buddha, is as transient as autumn clouds. I’ve learned (through relationships, traveling, etc) real security comes within, and how we can use our time, talents, and love to provide wholly for ourselves and others.

One of my favorite quotes is by Thoreau. “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams and live the life you’ve imagined.” We have to be generous with ourselves and forgive ourselves for opportunities that may have slipped by. Create new dreams and systematically work towards achieving them. As Kate writes,

“You can keep waiting for your life to change or you can do something about it.”

Instead of waiting for friends or significant others to take that trip, get up and go alone, because they may never be ready….”You can have this life too, if it’s what you want.” (Thanks Kate, great post!).

My life isn’t all waterfalls, sunsets, and rainbows so to speak. Even now, at a time when I can truly say “wow, I’m living my dreams!” I still have my personal struggles just like everyone else. I just don’t share them on Facebook like I do all my exciting travel photos. I acknowledge that a big part of how I got to where I am is the emotional and financial support of family, friends, and mentors in the pursuit of my dreams.

I have met people from a huge variety of financial backgrounds and personal circumstances who are currently traveling around the world. Through traveling, I’ve become much more aware of privilege (being American, white, from an educated, financially stable family, loving home environment, etc), and also of the importance of being grateful. But, at the end of the day, our lives aren’t handed to us. We build them. And the one thing I find myself wanting to tell the people I care about is “you should live the life you want. not for anyone else. but give what you can when you can. it’s very short and love in all forms is the only thing that truly matters.”I think we could all use more love and gentleness in our lives.

One of my favorite blog entries, Five Regrets of the Dying, originally shared by Bonnie Ware over at Inspiration and Chai, has started going viral on Facebook again (and she’s since released a full length book). I wish I had the courage to be my true self, and the courage to express my feelings. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. I wish I had let myself be happier.

Indeed, as exemplified by this beautiful compilation from those nearing the end of their lives, true security doesn’t come from diamond rings, 9-5’s, and big houses. And I would say that freedom doesn’t necessarily come from traveling the world. Freedom AND real security come through fulfilling our own needs and pursuing experiences that bring us joy and a sense of purpose. I’ve discovered that for me, this means traveling, capturing photos, sharing my feelings, seeing my family, and building a community of friends that digs deep into life, encourages, and inspires me. Above all, I think the first step to realizing personal dreams of any size or grandeur, is to believe that you deserve to be happy. It sounds simple, but our culture doesn’t teach us this. It’s a lesson we must teach ourselves.

Thanks for reading…GO BIG…and stay tuned for my next adventure.

kuang si falls is a special place. what’s better than swinging from a tree into a turquoise waterfall? not much. jim and i hiked to the top (kuang si falls is a series of 5 or 6 waterfalls) and worked our way down, so that we could enjoy a swim at the bottom after our hard work. it was a fairly challenging, steep hike. there were many paths, some of which led to dead ends and/or away from the falls, but it was a fun maze and we listened for the falls to find our way back.