Edafe & Nicholas | NYC Asylum Activist Love Story

A Profound LGBTQ Love Story Amid Activism and Asylum

Updated: May 25, 2027

This was one of the most special weddings of my 11-year career. When NYC gay celebrity wedding planner Jason Mitchell Kahn reached out to ask if I was available to photograph Edafe and Nicholas’ wedding, I immediately said yes after reading Edafe’s powerful story.

It was also my first wedding booking of 2022, and a true breath of fresh air. Covid had battered my business; I was anxiously checking my inbox daily for new inquiries and trying to rebuild my momentum after a decade in the industry. Edafe and Nicholas’ wedding felt like a gift from the universe. They kept telling me it was a privilege to work with me—but I felt exactly the same about them.

Please note: all quoted passages below are Edafe’s direct words from “Migrant Voices,” an oral testimony project from The Nation.

The Journey That Led to Love

Edafe Okporo is the founder of New York City’s first and only homeless shelter for asylum seekers. Born in Nigeria, his early activism focused on public health after multiple typhoid outbreaks in his community due to lack of clean drinking water. When he moved to Abuja, he began advocating for treatment access for gay men living with HIV.

“I was living in Niger state, a Muslim-dominated state that practices Sharia law. I started advocating for public-health policies such as clean drinking water… and then I discovered that my friends who were gay were also dying from HIV. That’s when I started suffering attacks.”

In 2014, Nigeria passed laws criminalizing homosexuality and activism with up to 14 years in prison. Citizens, not just police, were enforcing it. After surviving a mob attack and being subjected to conversion therapy by his own family, Edafe knew he had to leave.

“They dragged me out of my apartment and beat me in the street. They had found out I am gay, and they were going to kill me… That was the 24th of July. When I woke up in that clinic, I knew I had to leave the country.”

After a short time in Dubai, he flew to the U.S. for an LGBTQ conference, arriving at JFK with $200. He sought asylum immediately. Instead of refuge, he was handcuffed and imprisoned.

“They told me the paper I signed is for me to be deported… I suffered isolation, anxiety, fear of what would happen next.”

Edafe spent five months at Elizabeth Detention Center, sleeping on concrete, enduring harsh treatment, and preparing his asylum case. He was eventually granted asylum but had nowhere to go. With support from First Friends of NJ/NY and a kind colleague, he slowly rebuilt his life.

Building a Life and Finding Love

Edafe first worked in catering, then at an HIV clinic, but his heart was in advocacy. He went on to co-found RDJ Refugee Shelter in Harlem, New York’s only shelter for LGBTQ asylum seekers. In 2020, he won The David Prize and was recognized as a Logo 30 Honoree. He is also the author of ASYLUM, praised by The New York Times as “a disquieting account that humanizes a nameless, faceless multitude.”

“I hope I have contributed to the larger movement of equality for all by showing up and standing up for what is right, even when it is difficult… to show queer people they can pursue their education, keep a full-time job, write a book, be in love, and fight for a better world.”

To photograph Edafe and Nicholas’ wedding was a career highlight and a deep personal honor. It wasn’t just a celebration of love—it was a culmination of survival, courage, and chosen family. Every photo from their day holds joy, pain, resilience, and hope.

Please enjoy these images—the laughter inside them, and the stories they hold beneath the surface.

Planner @mrjasonmitchell
Photographer @ericacamillephotos
Church @fourthuniversalist
Venue @haroldpratthouse
Catering @parkavenuecatering
Flowers @fernbotanica
Live Music @edenlanejazz
DJ @djbackbr3aka
Make Up @creatingfaces_ny
Transportation @filmcarsny